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Rush’s Bitches

3 March 2009
Dolly Parton

Dolly Parton

Not since Dolly Parton so fully fleshed out the role of the madam of Texas’ infamous Chicken Ranch in the movie version of The Best Little Whorehouse in Texas, have we seen such an overstuffed person ride roughshod over “the girls” as Rush Limbaugh is doing today.  After daring to call Limbaugh an entertainer, and his show incendiary and ugly, the head of the RNC, Michael Steele, found it necessary to kiss Rush’s ample ass in a show of radical, right-wing penance.  All I could picture was Rush in a black leather dominatrix outfit, snapping his whip over the Republican Party.  What gives here?

Rush Limbaugh

Rush Limbaugh

Whatever has happened to those rough and tough Republicans that cling to the image of Ronald Reagan, the ultimate cowboy president?  Not only have they morphed into a bunch of little girls cowering in the gigantic shadow of Rush Limbaugh, they have all become his bitches in the prison sense of the word.  It must be very scary indeed over there on the far right, in the penitentiary the American people have sentenced the Republican Party to after its criminal performance in the Baby Bush years.  It seems the cell block is being run by a great big bully and nobody else brought their balls along.   It’s like an episode of MSNBC’s Lockup rated TV-MA discussing the brutal sexual practices inside.  And Rush Limbaugh is the rapist.

Why is it so hard for the Republican Party to learn the lessons of the last election and actually listen to the will of the American people?  It’s as though they were all infected by the W-virus, the symptoms of which are stubbornness, deafness, callousness and naïve, confused stupidity. While openly blaming George W. Bush for the ills that have befallen them, they can’t seem to do anything but follow in his sadly misguided footsteps.  It makes one want to scream, “For God’s sake, learn the lesson!”  But no matter how much anyone may scream, one must remember that the major symptom of the W-virus is deafness.  “We can’t hear you!” they whine in response to our moving lips.  It must be a very painful and disorienting disease.

Pat Buchanan

Pat Buchanan

Today on MSNBC, Pat Buchanan proclaimed that listening to Rush Limbaugh was exactly the right thing for the Republicans to do.  It is small wonder that the arch conservative former presidential candidate turned pundit would gleefully watch his chosen party lurch to the right.  But don’t the Republicans remember Mr. Buchanan’s dismal electoral track record?  Do they really want to follow him over the cliff of arch conservatism?  It appears that in their painful mourning period following the election of Barack Obama, they are prepared to do just that.  But let us not fool ourselves about the likes of Mr. Buchanan.  He isn’t leading anything.  He is simply joining “the girls” over at Rush Limbaugh’s Best Little Whorehouse on Radio.

Despite any rhetoric to the contrary coming from The Right, the real voice and leader of the Republican Party is Rush Limbaugh.  The bully has taken over the playground and has turned all the old bullies into his bitches.  How rich is that?  I’ll admit it.  I find it richly delicious.  The lemmings are headed for the cliff.  How close are they?  Pretty damn close.  And we don’t have to do anything.  We don’t even have to play the bad guys and give them a little push over the edge.  Rush Limbaugh is doing it for us.  Thanks, Rush.

Robert Gates, Secy. of Defense

Robert Gates, Secy. of Defense

Adding to the woes of the Republicans this week was the backhand slap taken by Defense Secretary Robert Gates at his former boss, George W. Bush.  Seems that he reluctantly succumbed to the prodding by David Gregory on Meet the Press, and admitted that Barack Obama was “more analytical” than his predecessor.  Of course, that came as no surprise to most of us, but the Republican pundits have been quick to accuse their fellow conservative of kissing up to his new boss.

In keeping with today’s theme, that is something they would know something about, considering how tightly their pursed lips are pressed to Rush Limbaugh’s robust posterior.  I’ve always suspected that in spite of their constant bravado, Republicans at heart are just a bunch of followers.  And with the absence of their former bullyboy, Dick Cheney, Rush is performing a much needed service to the fawning far right.  Is it really that hard to understand?

A bunch of second-tier bullies have been in a scared state of disarray since their leader failed to deliver control of the schoolyard last November.  “Damn, that new black kid really knows how to fight back!” they whine.  “We need a new bully who can punch back.”  So they turn to “The Mouth of the South,” Rush Limbaugh, for “spiritual” leadership in the wake of the ass-whuppin’ they got.

lemmings1What they don’t seem to get is that Rush is no more than a mouth.  That’s right.  The only thing bigger than Rush Limbaugh’s ass is his mouth.  If there’s anything to that old adage, “The bigger they are, the harder they fall,” then: TIMBER!  Get out of the way everybody, because the crash is going to be colossal.  The Republicans will find themselves falling into the deep crater that is sure to follow.

The whole thing is insane.  Instead of listening to the clear voice of the American People in November, the leadership and followership of the Republican Party has fallen in line behind a blowhard radio talk show host who demands “ditto-head” loyalty from his listeners.  That makes them all Rush’s bitches, whether they want to admit it or not.

So my advice to them is to nominate Rush Limbaugh as their candidate next time and see how that goes.  Of course, they do have the alternative of pulling the old bully, Dick Cheney, out of retirement and running him.  They will still be so deafened by the W-virus by 2012, that they won’t hear the American People who have long-since stopped listening to their outdated rhetoric and moved on.

Despite all that’s going on in the world today, it’s a great time to be a Democrat.  Yea, for our team!

KEEP FIGHTING THE GOOD FIGHT!

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7 Comments leave one →
  1. 3 March 2009 8:42 pm

    Jack,

    I bow to you for this most excellent piece of commentary….. I am not worthy….

    Just the thought of this “man”, and I use the term loosely, makes my skin crawl. I am waiting patiently for the day when he falls flat on his big fat face.

  2. poietes permalink
    4 March 2009 4:17 pm

    Love the “Best Little Whorehouse” analogy. Wish I had remembered that.

    • 5 March 2009 6:13 pm

      Dear Poietes,

      Nice to hear from you over here. I ran into you at Willpen’s World the other day. Welcome.

  3. starshine permalink
    5 March 2009 3:13 pm

    Nice commentary, Jack!

    Rush is blowing the smoke screen while Rove continues his quest to rewrite history. They’re laughable, really.

    Anyone think Rush still may be ‘enjoying’ a few drugs now and then? The guy was sweating like a stuck pig, and wowzer were his eyes glassy. We could attribute his sweating to being grossly over-weight and being under hot lights, but the eyes….

    • 5 March 2009 6:11 pm

      Why would Rush feel that he needs to give up his prescription drug habit? The Religious Right has forgiven him his trespasses, and the Republican Party is obviously too afraid of him to criticize bad behavior on his part.

      The right thing to do to buffoons is to laugh right in their faces. So, let the laughing commence.

  4. vadiusiasyday permalink
    29 March 2009 12:03 am

    damned good article..

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